The Roll of Children in Japanese Families

The roll of children in a family is kind of a intermediate between the parents. The parents think of their children the most important part of their family, and often more so than their lovers. The children become the heart of the family, and it so happens that the names of each individual in a family become names from a child’s perspective. As a example, when you call your wife you say “Okasan”, meaning “mother” which is the name their child uses to call their mother, and this happens vice versa. Also, this importance of the roll of children is one of the reasons the divorce rate is low in Japan. Even if the parents stopped loving each other it sometimes happens that the parents do not divorce. Children are the heart of the family in this respect as well. Because Japanese are not having children for work force anymore and are having children of their free will, this trend to “children is the heart of family” is thought to be as strong as ever before.

marrige and divorce in Japan

Japanese traditional marrige is through "Omiai", which is a meeting of two people (most oftenly men and women) who want to get married. In the old days these selections were done by their parents, and it wasn't unusual for people to marry their father's recommended person. However, it changed as time went by (thank goodness). Nowadays people tend to marry to whom ever they like, and with "Love"(well, sometimes it happens that the other is marrying a person for money, but let's think not). "Omiai" is still happening in Japan, and now it tends to be that their friends or their colleagues pick the other person, not their parents.
In the case of divorce, Japanese people tend to choose not to. The divorce rate haasn't changed much since the end of the war. This may be a good thing. But I think this may come from the fact that Japanese people are dependant and passive. They can't live without a partner, and they can't say even if they wanted to divorce. Maybe, this can be the reason for low divorce rate.

Dating in Japan

The process of becoming a couple is this; first a boy and a girl meet each other for the first time, then if either of them becomes interested in the other they ask the other for a private time together. After that one of them will declare their love to the other, and if the other person accepts it they go steady.
I think this process is more or less the same as in any country in the world. The different parts are the details of the dating. Firstly, Japanese students often make couples through university, part-time jobs, clubs, some other community you belong to, or Gou-kon or Nanpa. Gou-kon is kind of a party where boys and girls meet each other for the first time. You often do this in restaurants, bars, or karaoke. In preparing for the Gou-kon, a boy invites some of his friends and the girl (who is often friends with that boy) invites her friends, and the party goes on by the leadership of that boy and girl. Next, a Nanpa is picking up a girl (picking up s boy is called Gyaku-Nanpa). This is often done by guys who think themselves as cool. Also, sometimes girls wait on a bench or on the street to be picked up. A typical example is the school festival in the university. There are girls waiting to be picked up, and the boys are asking them for a meal (often two girls and two boys). Secondly, Japanese people often have date in restaurants, the café, amusement parks, the shopping mall, the park, game centers, or the hotel. There are no unusual places, but when couples go to a game center or amusement park, they often take Pri-kura. Pri-kura are decorated pictures which you can take in a certain machine placed in every game centers (kind of the box where you take our license pictures). Finally, declaring a love is very important in Japan. This is the occasion when people express their own feeling to the other person (Japanese often don’t express their love to each other every time). Declaring love is the only way to form a couple, either by saying it face to face or using a mobile phone to call or e-mail. The reserved character that Japanese have is the reason they use their mobile phone to declare their love.

Japanese groups

Peer Groups of Japan

The high school I went to was an all-boys school and there were no such thing as peer groups. Over all, I think there were three groups; sporty guys”Unndoubukei”, insiders”Bunnkakei”, and maniacs“Otaku”. ”Unndoubukei” is the guys who are nearly always on the move and like to romp around. Bunnkakei” is the guys who like being inside and read books or being silent. “Otaku” is the guys who are enthusiastic in a particular thing. In most schools these groups do not interact with each other. However, my case was rare one because there were no girls in the school and nothing to show off. Even so there were people who were popular, or outstanding. The popular kids were people who were funny, but the funny people do not always come from the same group. Also, people who are not funny weren’t thrown away into the shadows, but rather the funny guys gave him the spot light for anything special he could do. The interesting thing is that this nearly always changes the “not funny” people into “funny” people. Consequently, there were no hierarchies in high school. All had the same status and the personality was respected.
In junior high school, however, we had a different type of groups. In junior high, I went to a coeducational school, and the groups were; bad guys” Huryou”, good guys”Yuutousei”, maniacs”Otaku”, and others”Chuukaisha”. Huryou” was the guys who disregard the school rules, and wearing school uniforms in a forbidden way. ”Yuutousei” is the guys who got good marks in tests and the favorite of the teachers. ”Chuukaisha” is the guys who mediates the groups and keep a friendly face to every group. In this case, no group interacted with each other, expect for the”Chuukaisha”. Also, there are no hierarchies. They just hate each other and do not interfere.
Over all, Japanese groups have no hierarchies. They make groups, but the status of each group is the same.

こんにちは、島田尚輝というものです。
簡単に自己紹介というものを行いたいと思います。
まず好きな食べ物ですが、卵とチーズと小倉です。
勘違いしないでほしいんですが、これはすべて単品で好きなわけではありません。
すなわち付属品として好きなんです。
嫌いな食べ物は特にありませんね～。
趣味はやっぱり運動をすることですが、特にサッカーが好きですね。
しかしこのごろ読書の良さもわかるようになりました。
まさに「文武両道」な趣味を目指しています。
まぁ僕に関してはこのくらいです。
ひとつ付け加えておきたいのは、僕はパソコンが苦手な人だということです。
なんせ縄文時代に戻って狩をしたい人ですから。笑
まぁそういう所謂「時代遅れ」なやつなんでそこらへんはよろしくお願いします。
ぁぁ・・・後、僕は小学校のとき三年間シドニーに住んでいたことがあります。
オーストラリアはホントにいいところですよね～。
きっとアメリカも良いところです。行きたいです！！！


Hello, I'm Naoki Shimada.
I think I'll introduce myself a bit.
Firstly, my favourite foods are eggs, cheese, and red beans.
I don't want to be misunderstood, but I don't eat these things all by itself.
I like these as a "support food".
I don't really have foods I hate.
My hobby is sports, but especially I love soccer.
But recently I had the pleasure of finding out that reading is in fact interesting.
This is what you call "BUNBU RYOUDOU".
Well, this is it about me.
In fact, the thing I want to add is that I'm not good at computers.
-I want to go back generations and hunt animals.(laugh)
So, I'm what you call a "backwards" kind of guy, but please be friendly.
Oh yeah...and I lived in Sydney for three years when I was in primary school.
Australia is such a nice place.
I imagine that America is cool too. I want to go to America!!!